Here’s the question:

I’m a stay-at-home mom, but I also freelance three days a week. Balancing parenting with my writing career is more difficult than I thought it would be. We do need the extra income, and we feel strongly that we’re to be the ones raising our three children. However, I’m verging on burn-out over here and can’t get a break for all the interruptions.

Happy first day of summer, everyone!

Let’s face it, there really is a crush of godless parenting advice out there, and sometimes I think the devil just brainstormed up every parenting lie possible that completely opposes  scripture and like Hitler’s cronies, we buy the outrageous lies with no questions asked. And the fine print on the price tag demands our children’s souls.

A biblical worldview is crucial to raising godly children in this culture. This simply means putting on your “God lenses”, becoming familiar with His words, seeking His will for every facet of your life. It may be old-fashioned and unpopular, but it’s obedience! God tells us in His word to “come out from them and be separate” yet how is this done exactly?

I’m ever so thankful for my Christian upbringing by loving parents, and for the several older and wiser couples along the way who weren’t afraid to stop alongside and share what God had shown them about this great adventure of parenting. It’s so easy to get discouraged, confused, off-track and just plain exhausted when it comes to raising kids with a Biblical world-view, a heart for others and that genuinely want to obey and respect God and their elders. I do firmly believe it is possible, yes, even in 2010, to accomplish this because in spite of many failures on my part, I’m seeing the sweet fruit in my children every day. We’re not talking perfection, ha. But parenting by the “Book” does reap radical rewards.

I love opportunities to encourage other moms to take to heart the Biblical direction found in Titus 2 to “…love their husbands and to love their children…” and to “Train up a child in the way he should go…” so I was excited when a pastor friend asked me to contribute to the Parenting Q & A portion of his website, WordExplain.com. So far I’ve contributed two articles, the most recent one is titled, “When Life is Not Fair.” If you have any questions you’d like addressed in the column, please email  Mary[@]homesteepedhope.com–without the brackets, and I’ll do my best to share the bottom line of what’s worked for our family. If you do take time to stop by his site, I want to add that there are many more parenting articles archived there covering a variety of subjects.

“What God is to the world, parents are to their children.”

–Philo

It’s a big responsibility, but let me ask this…what in the world are we doing for God’s sake? If you’re a parent, there’s your answer.

By the way, some exciting changes are happening at Writer…Interrupted! We’re in the process of going to a monthly magazine format with something for everyone. I’ll keep you posted as it progresses.

Head’s Up! Tomorrow is May Day–and as the tradition goes, it’s a great day to put a basket together and leave it on your neighbor’s doorstep…how sneaky can you be?

Our favorite ideas for baskets:

• dishtowels
• bedding plants
• garden gloves
• seed packets
• homemade cookies
• mini-loaves of bread w/a jar of jam

Have a great day!

On other fun topics, it’s about baby chick time again! And my original flock of 25 is fine and dandy. Spring must be in the air, as egg production is bumping up even without my daily dosing of their feed with cayenne pepper!

My 4.5 year old is reading! And loving it! All this after discovering she could spell with the kindergartners and first graders at our homeschool co-op’s practice spelling bee. She did so well we dusted off the early readers we had laying around and she’s addicted.

I’ve ordered some beautiful copywork books from queenhomeschool.com, and can’t wait till their arrival! Also have a fun music book on its way from playbyear.com. Fun, fun!

What’s new with you?

But some good things have come of it…come see pics from our first day of school and read all about my adjustments!

Thought this pic of my youngest juggling cukes about sums it all up! Lately it seems I’ve been blogging by the skin of my teeth…sorry about that!

(Oops, wordpress isn’t letting me post the picture…I’ll try again later!)

For me, it began almost three years ago. You’ll remember many posts from me on the subject of my women’s fiction writing, and how easily I could lose myself in it–letting the children and housework fall apart around me. What a struggle to find balance, in fact, balance was so elusive, I finally quit fiction writing altogether. I just couldn’t reconcile the two passions–homeschooling and a writing career. I know better women than me can juggle these things…and maybe someday I’ll be able to, but not now.

At first letting go was terribly depressing. I hung onto my writing projects like a toddler on the verge of losing his blankie…I’d never had a passion outside my children and husband before. Sounds pathetic, but remember I married right out of high school, and my family has been my world. And I’ve been so fulfilled that I never felt anything was missing. Discovering the books within me, though, tapped a brand-spanking-new-and-exciting dimension of ME…a falling in love experience…a happy realization that God gifted me with this crazy love of words for a reason! Wow. Anyway. I lost myself in this dream for a year…devouring books on the writing craft and going to writing conferences and learning from other pros and wannabes. Pure bliss…that continually battled my family for my time until I realized that I had to cut back. And cutting back didn’t work. Giving it up altogether finally made the difference.

My point is, I’m not missing the fiction writing at all these days. I’m not even all that concerned when a week goes by without blogging. We’re ramped up about homeschooling and spending time with friends and church activities…right now the solitary and immersive lifestyle of writing isn’t possible! I don’t want it to be possible. I want my life to be about homeschooling and enjoying these girls while they’re little and being a 30-something stay-at-home mom is my ultimate joie de vivre!

How did I end up letting go of my writing dreams? Well, honestly, I haven’t let go of them. I feel a real peace that those are future chapters in my life, ones I anticipate and gladly put off for a more convenient time…possibly not until my kids are raised! I begged and pleaded with the Lord about it, especially because I got to the point where I would have gladly put the girls in public school just so I could have a full day of unfettered writing time. I began resenting my family’s needs and that was what finally opened my eyes to my wrong priorities. Wrong for *me* because God has emphatically called us into this homeschooling lifestyle.

Asking God to realign my desires with His really meant turning OFF my passion for writing. Please, I’m not preaching at anyone, this is *my* story–I’m not cut out to balance two passions. Not as whole-hog as I am about my “babies” (both real and imagined!)!

Anyway, I just realized today how God’s given me back my satisfaction with this season of life. And it’s a pretty blessed arrival, deserving of documentation at my site!

Anyone relate?

Want a good recipe for all that zucchini your garden is producing? Zucchini Quiche is the best way to go…it’s easy to prepare, looks quite impressive and most children even like it!

Happy Thursday!

Have a great Thursday!

It’s been forever, so I spent some time gathering my hastily jotted notes–yes, even when I’m not writing, I have great dialog and ideas for scenes flashing through my ever busy brain–and fleshed out an already started GMC chart for hero and heroine. GMC stands for goals-motivation-conflict, in case you’re wondering.

My hero needed some help. He’s a nice guy, despite his inner turmoil. Too nice, probably. So I was pleased to find these blog articles by Susan May Warren (author of Chill Out, Josey!) over at Book Therapy. The one I’ve linked to is the first in the series, and even if you don’t play around at writing like I do, you might enjoy checking them out. Writers evaluate everything. It feeds our creativity, lol. I can’t even watch a movie anymore without getting to the heart of every little detail…things that I love or hate, what makes the main characters tick.

So Susan’s articles on heroes and their “Noble Causes, Flaws and Fears” really hooked me. Especially as one of her examples is spot on for what I’ve written. My fictional hero’s dad died in the line of duty when he was 9 years old, and hero grew up wanting to be just like him (not dead, you know what I mean *wink*). He served in the military police, and came home to work in a small town police department near his childhood community. He has a “protector complex”, but I wasn’t sure what other flaws I should give the poor man.

He’s already made “his stunning mistake”, he is atoning for it, but I have yet to figure out how to have him betray one of his “deepest values” for the sake of the more important one. Have I lost you? Maybe Susan’s explanation using Mel Gibson’s struggle in The Patriot will help:

“Well, here’s why…because at some point in your story, your hero is going to have to choose between the two values. He’ll have to betray the one, and choose the other.

But why can’t he just have both?

Because, the best tension is INNER tension…and competing values are what makes a story take a reader’s breath away. It’s why we’ll cry at Sommersby, and why Mr. Darcy’s confession of love gets us in the heart every time, and why it’s so darn heroic when Mel Gibson comes riding up with the mended American flag after his son is killed in the Patriot. Every character has had to grapple with their inner values, and find the one that pushes them forward. The one that is most Noble.”

I should say that I’m on the fourth draft of this particular novel…yeah…so I still have a lot to learn and am using this story to hone my craft! May it someday see the light of day, one can always hope!

My favorite movie heroes include Tom Hanks (You’ve Got Mail), Keanu Reeves (Lake House), and Mel Gibson (The Patriot). As far as book heroes go, I really loved Trevor in Deb Raney’s Remember to Forget, Landon in Denise Hunter’s Surrender Bay, and Jamie in Liz Curtis Higg’s Lowlands of Scotland series.

All my favorite heroes have one thing in common, they all make me swoon! They’re courteous to a fault, protective and committed. And usually tormented by their past, or the heroine’s past.

What do you look for in a hero, and what are some of your fictional/movie favorites? If you can think of their flaws/fears/noble causes, will you share them in comments?

Come over to Writer…Interrupted today and read my post, “Finding the Time”…

Second~

Have you noticed the new “Comment Luv” plug-in here at the site in the comments section? It’s a pretty nifty way of letting us know what your latest blogpost was, and you only have to enable it once. Go for it, I’m waiting!

Third~

Some of you know about my seven year old daughter’s two month long ordeal with inclusion cysts on her foot. Long story short, she got the mother of splinters neatly stuck in and out of the ball of her foot. I got most of the splinter out, but had to take her in to the doctor to get the rest. He thought he got it all, but in the next few weeks, she developed two blue-ish cysts about an inch below the “excavation” site of the splinter. Took her back to the same doctor, he lanced them, drained them and said if they came back we’d probably need to go the surgery route. So yesterday we took her to “the big city” to a podiatrist who gently manipulated her foot, X-rayed it, and is setting us up for a foot ultrasound. If the ultrasound shows a foreign body within the cyst, then he’ll want to cut it out, which means somewhat of a recovery and that 7 yo will have to hobble around on crutches for a short while. If there is no foreign body evident, then we play the “wait and see” game. This is what we’re praying for. I’m also making an appointment with an expert in Alternative Therapies to get her excellent advice before we jump into the surgery solution.

Thanks for all your prayers! Btw, 7 yo is in no pain from these cysts, and she is still feeling great after her four days of 103*+ fevers!