November 17, 2024

The Way You Do

All Things Grow with LoveCrazy man of mine…last night I was tippy-toeing, standing on the bottom bunk, reaching up to hug our daughter good-night and before I know it, dh has me sitting on his shoulders and is waltzing me around the room! Scary, me almost 32 and him 35! All I have to say is, it’s a good thing we have 9 foot ceilings!

Then tonight, on the way home from town, we sang Lean On Me and The Way You Do The Things You Do and many other oldies to a tape he made me when we were dating…

He’s so much fun. I’m so glad I married me a laid-back one. Debi Pearl would label him a Mr. Steady. He’s my broom, as I tell our girls, ’cause, of course, as the song says, he swept me off my feet.

On two instances this weekend, I was in conversations in which the wives were sharing how upset their husbands got when asked to do anything. I think we all could find something to share when conversations take these turns…but to what end? Talking about it, only feeds the negativity, the discontentment. And for each of these “so-called” negative attributes, there’s often the flip side to our spouse that is pretty dandy if you ask me. Take my dh’s laid-back personality. Things don’t bother him. (Believe me, this can be a good or bad quality!)

Anyway, I came home after those chats, thinking about how wonderful my husband is. Yes, he’s got his faults (don’t we all?), but 14 years with him as well as observing other marital relationships, have taught me that happiness isn’t about perfect yards, and pristine properties. Nor is it about dwelling on the various truck skeletons we have decorating the premises, or the falling down barn we have yet to finish salvaging.

It’s the knowing that between you, your spouse and God, things are covered. There’s trust, respect, love, and a little bit of fun to keep things sweet. No. Matter. What.

The Best and Most Beautiful Things - Helen Keller

14 thoughts on “The Way You Do

  1. Mary, sometimes it is very hard for some of us to appreciate the men we married.

    My husband has great qualities, but I see more of the negative which impacts not only myself but my two boys.

    They are now fully aware that “daddy” is addicted to his computer game.

    You are blessed to have such a fun-loving, Christian man.

  2. Right, I know I have nothing to complain about. I wasn’t begrudging my friends their complaints, my heart went out to them, but at the same time it helped me appreciate my dh more. See, these friends have beautiful homes, perfect yards, seemingly perfect lives and husbands, but I hear the opposite coming out of their mouths. It just really made me appreciate that in what really matters–relationship–my dh gets an A+.

    That you can see your husband as having great qualities is huge, Leticia. I know godly women, who are married to “godly” men, who don’t have a good thing to say about their husbands. So they usually don’t say anything, but when they do, it’s hard to see. Makes me sad that so many Christian men neglect to treat their families the way they treat their church families. KWIM? We’ll keep praying for your husband’s salvation. I’m sorry, Let, that he puts his games above you guys. They’re so addictive…can you guys come to a compromise about it? And on the flip side, I’ve heard of husband/wives really having a blast playing computer games against each other…would that be an option?

    Not trying to meddle, just wanting to help! Love ya!

  3. I would like to play with him but he plays online and talks on the phone with two of his buddies.

    Mary, the newest game he is addicted to is called Warcraft. Want to know what this game looks like? Here is the link. IF you view the trailer you can see why people flock to this game. However, it may seemingly look innocent, but once you delve into it, it is evil. Here is the link: https://signup.worldofwarcraft.com/trial/index.htm

    Your prayers are appreciated, thank you.

  4. Leticia, I did follow your link and share your concern! Just don’t get panicked about it, take it to God and try not to let it created a huge wedge between you and your hubby. Remember God tells us, “In all your ways acknowledge Him and He will keep your paths straight.” In all our ways. Even the ones that we don’t understand or want any part of. God promises your dh will be “won without a word”…1 Peter 3…

  5. Mary, you are going to crack up when I tell you this. I pointed at him this afternoon, and said his name, “Jesus loves you! Repent!” hee. I was silenced. *giggle*

  6. Great post Mary. I agree with you that we need to remain positive about our spouses, just the way they are. Out of the overflow of the heart the mouth speaks, so we need to put good things into our hearts with regard to our spouses. I virtually stopped watching news for example. I did it because it was a source of negativity for me that made me a sour person. It made a huge difference. My wife is wonderful and I love her as she is. She completes me… which is another way of saying we are ifferent. SOmetimes frustratingly so, but always for the better!

  7. Thank you for posting such a thoughtful reply, Larry! I bet that was a hard habit to break, too. Of course, with how the media twists things to suit their own agenda, I don’t know that you’re missing anything! And what a gain for you and your wife.

    I loved your last statement about the wife completing their husband being another way of saying they’re different. Wow.

  8. Opting out of news probably isn’t for everyone, but it is helpful for me. The way I see it, in days past people didn’t have so much instant information about what was going on in the world. I figure I don’t need it either. I have ample opportunity to hear about the “really important stuff”, but frankly, what happens here isn’t all that interesting to me. What’s up in the Kingdom is what I want to know.

    BTW, I have a new post up at “A Layman’s Thoughts” entitled “Jesus Loves Me, This I Know.”

  9. Mary, I tried to keep a straight face, but one look at his face, I lost it!

    Hey! I have to let him know that he needs to repent and that the Lord truly loves him.

  10. As long as it doesn’t drive a rift between you! Sounds like the humor made it doable…but honestly check out 1 Peter 3 and see how it’s done! Amazing advice in that passage to women with unbelieving spouses. And it’s mostly got to do with keeping the mouth shut… 😉

  11. Larry, I’m not a “news” person myself. Weather, occasionally, but not much. Sometimes I’m embarrassed at how little I pay attention to what’s going on in the world. I get most of my info online anymore.

    I’ll be sure to check out your post, thanks for letting me know!

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